Four-twenty had no relevance in my life before I moved to Boulder.

It still doesn't.

Gathering on Norlin for the sole purpose of lighting up isn't my bag. Gathering there to slackline or go for a bike ride? Sure. Or yoga -- if a few thousand people meet up to do sun salutations on Patanjali's birthday, I'm there. But the idea of 4/20's ambient cannabis cloud alone makes me reach for my albuterol inhaler.

That said, I support you 4/20ers. I am psyched that so many of you will manage to crawl out of your man-caves, emerge from mom's basement, and/or suction your ass out of the sofa to get outside today.

You're outdoors. Good job. The Daily's outdoor recreation reporter salutes your effort.

What's more, hopefully the MMJ folks will get some of the added health benefits of sunshine, assuming it doesn't rain, and assuming your body can still produce vitamin D via sunlight through the beefy marijuana haze that will shade the quad around 4:21 p.m. Unless it's a windy day, in which case the official light-up could be challenging, which could result in hippies freaking out, like when the Burning Man was lit early, leaving conflicted free-lovers choosing between opposing chants: "Let him burn!" and "Save the man!"

Are you still chill if your Zippo is malfunctioning in chinook winds at 4:20 on 4/20? Take it from the outdoors reporter and go to REI for waterproof matches -- they're bomber.


The day is supposed to be a peaceful protest of sorts, but let it also serve as an example, a heuristic (that word probably jolted your mellow, weedy brain, sorry) for more outside time, less man-cave time; more fresh air and Colorado sun, less dialated pupils and waxy visages; more actual experiences out there , less Matthew McConaughey or Jersey Shore or whatever the hell it is you stay in and watch when you're baked and/or paranoid.

Today, your bong moved beyond your shitty old coffee table, beyond the confines of your crusty couch and out into the world.

Congrats on the paradigm shift. Mary Jane bought a suitcase and packed it. Now take that bong places it has never seen.

Don't wait for 4/20/12. Do this all over again soon. (But not when there's a countywide fire ban.)

Because you look pasty, man-cave man. And kinda hungry.