christy fantz
Christy Fantz

Bradley Cooper got a perm.

Like a permanent.

A few weeks back, he was pictured in pink perm rollers on the set of his latest flick in Boston, then Tuesday he was spotted in his tight-curled grandeur.

(Fingers crossed it's an '80s porn.)

The reaction from society often turns ludicrous when stars alter their egos for roles -- Charlize Theron still reigns queen. (And by society I mean Life & Style magazine.)

Remember when Tom Hanks grew a fat beard for 2000's "Cast Away"? The public outcry was merciless. It was like Y2K rose from its monochrome grave and slapped the Lotus 1-2-3 out of us. (Mmm. Vintage.)

Or when Steve Carrell got his chest hair waxed in "40 Year Old Virgin."

Or when Renee Zellweger got those Warheads implanted into her Derek Zoolander cheeks. I mean, gained 25 pounds for "Bridget Jones" series.

Best transformation: Rob McElhenney gaining 50 pounds just for the well? of it for season seven of "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia." He told celebrity news site The Wrap, "You know what the most fun was, was getting rid of any shred of vanity." Mac explained that his weight gain was a mockery of other stars that get better looking as their series' age. Go Mac. (Boulder is piiiisssed. Shhh.)

Anyway, Cooper is teaming up with Jennifer Lawrence and the pair's "Silver Linings Playbook" director David O. Russell for a '70s-era FBI flick.

I smell sex. Get a room.

 

Headline of the week

"Justin Bieber Still Hasn't Picked Up His Monkey From Germany," read Yahoo! omg! gossip site. (Quit yelling as us.)

I could take this down a dirt road. Instead I'm going to spank Justin Bieber('s monkey).

The kid got a baby Capuchin monkey for his 19th birthday. He tried bringing Mally the monkey into Germany, but she was confiscated and taken to a shelter because Biebs didn't bring proper paperwork.

"If the monkey is not picked up, then we will give him away," Karl-Heinz Joachim, director of the Munich shelter, said to Spiegel Online.

Meanwhile, Bieber continued on with his life of all things neon and spanking his attached monkey.

He needs a dose of PETA's gratuitous violence. (Holy animal advocacy, Bat-savers. Put down the red paint. Insert bong in mouth. Hit. Harder. Now that's a good PETA.)

 

Late night swap

Jimmy Fallon is taking over "The Tonight Show" from Jay Leno.

"Heavens to Betsy!" said three fans of the head-bobbing chin.

"Daddy's home," said his 200 vintage vehicles.

"Emancipation!" said his stand-up comedy.

"Get lost," said Conan O'Brien.

"Finally," said the rest of us.

(Fine. You like Leno. You would.)

When Fallon first started his gig on NBC, I was wary, at best. He sucked on "Saturday Night Live." Corpsing is funny ... on occasion. It's OK to break when Will Ferrell's shirt raises above his hairy belly button during a skit.

Not all the damn time.

I think the late-night hosting gig fits him just fancy. He's charming, he laughs (as SNL told us) and the kid can drum up some good convo with his guests.

Plus he has The Roots as a house band. The Roots!

And! NBC is letting Lorne Michaels take over producing duties and is moving the show back to New York where it originally started.

Shit's coming up May flowers over there.

NBC, hear me now: If you replace Jimmy's spot with Carson Daly, I will slap the product-placed Snapple right out of you.