I 'm surprised that non-beer lovers haven't been ousted from this state, like the Republicans. Or something. What? We went blue.
Beer lovers in Colorado are... extreme?
Passionate? Flavorful? Drunk? Gassy?
All of the above. (Who can cure beer farts? Step forward and the world will kiss you.)
Alas, Colorado beer nuts clearly like booze, so that means we like them. That's how it works.
Take a break from the homebrew operation in your moldy tub -- humping the hops, malting the barley, screwing the suds and yanking the yeast (something like that) -- and let the pros do it for you tonight at the Denver Winter Brew Fest 2013 at 7 p.m.
Mile High Station, 2027 W. Colfax Ave., Denver, will have unlimited tastings of some of the best craft beers from Colorado. There will be live music by Denver gypsy-rock group Lost Caravan, food vendors and more.
Hopefully this will satiate your pilsner palate until your sink stout is tapped.
Info: Tonight at 7 p.m. 720-946-7721; $30-$45
The best color of chili
Green chili has become quite the delicacy this side of the Rockies.
Or is it the Rio Grande?
Whatever. Just slop that ingredient on my sandwiches, my burritos, my tots, my pizza, my cheesecake ... It's delicious.
The thing is, I'm not a foodie about it. Mainly, because I hate that stupid word, and also because I'll pretty much shove any variety that involves chili peppers in my gullet. They're loco delicioso. (Crazy delicious? My Spanish blows.)
(However, pure laud paid to a breakfast joint in Buena Vista years ago that smothered my burrito with the most ridiculous spicy green bliss. The café's name escaped my memory soon after breakfast when my PBR and I fell out of the raft on the Arkansas River. I'm special.)
Anyway, I can't think of anything further from our green heaven than the Best Tasting Green Chili Contest at Steve's Snappin' Dogs, 3525 E. Colfax, Denver, on Saturday at 1 p.m.
Gabby Gourmet -- Denver's guide to eats -- will join Steve's in hosting the inaugural event where local celebrities (um, hello? I'm a local celebrity.*) will judge more than 15 area restaurants' chili and talk about it via live radio broadcast.
Best of all, there will be free samples for us. Steve's will donate a portion of the restaurant's daily sales to Project Angel Heart.
Some participating restaurants: 3 Margaritas, Annie's Cafe, Attivo Pizzeria, Blue Bonnet, Bonnie Brae Tavern, Brewery Bar II, Bull & Bush, Ellucerito, Gridiron Grille, Jack n Grill, La Loma, Lucy, Marczyk Fine Foods, Punch Bowl, Rosa Linda's, Santiago's, Steuben's and Wynkoop.
Now I want some sort of smothered chili-changa, dammit.
*Up for debate.
Info: Saturday 1 p.m.-3 p.m.; stevessnappindogs.com; free