Tacos! Tacos! Tacos!
Nope. You're thinking of Nick Swardson's tugjob operation in "Reno 911." (I'm dating myself. As in aging, not rubbing.)
But I'm actually talking about the Denver Taco Festival, which is Saturday and Sunday at Infinite Monkey Theorem, 3200 Larimer St., Denver. This music, tequila and taco street party will host local bands, exotic tequilas (40!) and tacos, of course. The festival organizers gathered the top local producers of taco goodness — about 20 vendors.
There will also be racing Chihuahuas vying for El Jefe Supreme (I'm looking at you, Bean Le'Chrys, Denver's sexiest Chihuahua), Mexican lucha libre wrestlers, a hot-pepper eating trivia contest (eat a pepper to stay in the game) and more.
Local bands include: Champion, The Train Wreckers, The Dendrites and Blow the Vault.
Info: denvertacofestival.com; $12-$89; noon-6 p.m. on Saturday
Parts of Broken Lizard
Kevin Heffernan (Farva!) and Steve Lemme from "Super Troopers" and "Beerfest" (among other gems) will be at Comedy Works, 1226 15th St., Denver, tonight and Saturday for four shows at 7:30 and 9:45 p.m. both nights.
I threw up the shocker in a photo I have with Farva when the Broken Lizard comedy crew was in Boulder in 2009 (they drank at the Downer!), so I know him. Just like I know Mohammed Ali. He autographed a Church of Latter Day Saints brochure when I met him in the South Bend airport at age 12. So suck on that, laymen. We're three besties.
Anyway, Lemme and Heffernan are funny dudes. Go see them.
Five Points and food trucks
Since food trucks are the old "Orange is the New Black," which is the new black ... um... Five Points is hosting the Final Friday Food Truck Fiesta.
Eight of 'em will gather at Our Mutual Friend Malt & Brew, 2810 Larimer St,. Denver, tonight from 6-10. Our Mutual Friend will have beers on tap, along with breweries Diebolt and Jagged Mountain, wine from Mile High Winery and cider from Stem Ciders.
There will be salsa dancing lessons, a DJ, an appearance from the Denver Fashion Truck and a bike giveaway. Food trucks: Crock Spot, Street Eats 5280, The Orange Crunch, LLC, N.Z's Smokin' Guns, Big Kiwi Eats, Kassia's Pasta Farm, Sweet 'Ness Cupcakes and AikoPops. Info: on.fb.me/1nJbli1
Doesn't the Outdoor Handmade Homemade Market know that Widespread Panic is at Red Rocks this weekend?
Um. This local crafty market hosts more than 40 vendors, live music, food and more on Saturday (1-7 p.m.) at Youth on Record, 1301 W. 10th Ave., Denver. The crafty folk bring a range of everything from art, pottery, baked goods, herbal elixirs, crafty gifts, furniture and more.
Go find the best present you'll ever buy someone because it's handmade. Like we can craft shit. Info: denverhaho.org; $5 donation
The Cherry Blossom Denver festival is celebrating Japanese culture on Saturday and Sunday. The Mile High's own Sakura Matsuri will hold its block party in LoDo's Sakura Square — on Lawrence Street, between 19th and 20th Streets.
There will be live entertainment (Japanese dance and martial arts), drumming (featuring Denver Taiko), 40 arts and crafts vendors, food and drink (udon, teriyaki chicken, sushi, greeb tea, beer, all the good stuff) and exhibits and demonstrations (featuring Japanese calligraphy). Info: Saturday (11 a.m.-6 p.m.) and Sunday (11 a.m.-4 p.m.); free
If you're blacking out at Three Lions or Streets of London for World Cup watching parties on east Colfax this weekend, pop into the Sie FilmCenter, 2510 E. Colfax Ave., Denver, for a film break.
Premiering exclusively tonight is "The Internet's Own Boy: The Story of Aaron Swartz," the story of the political activist, hacktivist and co-founder of Reddit, who was found hanging in his apartment after he was arrested by MIT police and charged with numerous counts that carried a penalty of up to 35 years in prison. The documentary looks at how Swartz fought to keep the internet free and open. Tickets are $10. denverfilm.org.
Also check out the Music & Movie Trivia Night at Sie on Mondays at 7:30 p.m.
Punk and circumstance
If you are "lucky" enough to have tickets to the sold-out Red Rocks Panic gangbang, then congratulations. Now go drape yourself in hemp and organic poop.
Or go the opposite route and get dirty at 3 Kings Tavern, 60 S. Broadway, Denver, this weekend with King Rat, Denver's oldie-but-goodie punk band, which is celebrating 20 years together.
Pound PBR tall boys, inside a tallboy koozies, inside a gritty punk club, inside the bowels of fantastic South Broadway. Then go for drunk pizza at Famous around the corner. Info: 3kingstavern.com; both Saturday and Sunday nights at 9; $15-20
Follow Christy: Twitter.com/FantzyPants