So I look across this table full of ardent beer drinkers raving about each pint in their hand and ask, "OK, well, which is your favorite?"
Because a bunch of brew-chuggers must have a favorite they like to meet sloppy inebriation with. Upping the stakes, I ask, "Like, which would you choose if you could only drink one for the rest of your lives?"
The anger and bargaining kicks. "We want them all!" my moderately booze-crazy friends say. "Monogamy is too cruel a rule."
But what about you? Find the love of your life via pint glass, or still looking for the right fit? Here, you fickle folks unwilling to settle, the Beer Girl is in.
Tonight, you'll find a brand new brew spewing into glasses at Upslope Brewing (1501 Lee Hill Road). The Summer Herbal Ale-Gruit (man, that's so Boulder) has regional herbs from the Front Range, elderberries (just like yo mama smells like) and chamomile. Achieve the zen that is this beer from 6 to 8 p.m.
Over at Avery Brewing (5763 Arapahoe Ave.), brewers there have unleashed Batch 12 of The Beast Grand Cru Ale. It'll gitcha, with a 15- to 17-percent ABV, deep burgundy color and flavors like honey, pineapple and plums. 'Tis the season of The Beast, folks. (Could be online only)
Wild Woods Brewery (5460 Conestoga Ct.) has its own Throw-Back Thursday planned, bringing back the River Rock Brown Ale. (Sorry, they paired that news with a photo from the San Juan mountains, and I started drooling and ...)
Speaking of all the happiness that is beer and Colorado, Fate Brewing (1600 38th St.) folks have issued a challenge. With Fate's inaugural Boulder Craft Beer Fest Aug. 23, they want you to tweet or Instagram photos of you all blissed-out in Boulder with the hashtag #drinkyourfate and #boulderlove and you could win tickets to the festival.
We all remember that little flood last September. Well, the folks at Boulder Beer (2880 Wilderness Pl.) want to help the Mercantile Cafe in Jamestown Sunday. From 2:30 to 6:30 p.m., there will be food and live music and all of Boulder Beer's delish brews. The goal's to raise $5,000 so the Merc can get its new espresso machine and further caffeinate those rebuilding after the flood.
(Just went up there myself today. There's a lot of work to do, and lots of beer to drink for a great cause.) Funds from food sales and the Merc's items — coffee cards, handmade mugs, etc. — will head to their fine coffee dreams. P.S.: Boulder Beer is tapping into Cork 'N' Berry Blueberry Ale at 4 p.m. Tuesday.
Should you be brave enough to battle the rodents of unusual size, or to avenge your father's death with a fight scene timed to a dramatic score, or to tell folks you love them in codes they take years to decipher, you won't want to miss the Boulder Outdoor Cinema's latest offering.
I almost don't want to tell you that it's "Princess Bride" showing this Saturday at dusk, because you should already know that. Go get over to 1750 13th St. and enjoy one of the best movies of all time.
Follow Alex on Twitter: @ansieh.