Y ou've already missed four (FOUR!) days of Colorado Craft Beer Week, but luckily that bastard rolls into the weekend through Sunday.
The event, in its third year now, is run by the Colorado Brewers Guild.
Let me tell you a story about these cats.
Once upon a 1995 ago, much like when colonial white-hairs gathered at the pub for a frosty one, dudes in flannel shirts and tribal tattoos and chicks in Jennifer Aniston hairstyles (a la the "Rachel") sat around and decided to create a guild for those who turned their bathtub suds into casks and barrels of delicious craft beer.
It was the mid-90s, I had to conjure up some visuals. You're welcome.
Anyway, now, like ... what, 20-something years later (I do words, not numbers), there's like ... a whole mess of craft brewers all over the state (again, words here).
Needless to say, when this state isn't throwing beer seeds on concrete to grow another brewhouse, we're celebrating, drinking and being merry. Or hairy.
Colorado Craft Beer Week hosts various tappings, beer dinners, mingling with the brewers and such. I'll give you some good places to start, but there's so damn much. You can find the whole schedule online here: cobeerweek.com.
Legends & Rarities
The Star Bar, 2137 Larimer St., Denver, is celebrating the, well, legends and rarities.
Each brewer will pour two beers -- a legend and a rarity. Reps will be on hand from breweries to chat your drunk ass up.
Breweries in attendance: Avery, Boulder Beer, Breckenridge, Great Divide, Left Hand, New Belgium, Odell, Oskar Blues, Ska, Wynkoop.
Info: Tonight at Star Bar from 6-9; 720-328-2420; $30 for 30 drink tickets
Beers and Spears
Saturday in the Barrel Room at Denver Beer Co., 1695 Platte St., Denver, the joint, along with gourmet Denver pickle makers, The Real Dill, will host a party of three beers and three pickles.
One of the beers even has ingredients from one of the pickles, and there is a spicy pickle eating contest. The winner gets a growler of beer and a jar of pickles.
I want a pickle now. That's what she said.
Info: Saturday 3-6 p.m.; 303-433-2739
New Kids On The Block
Saturday, The Lobby, 2191 Arapahoe St., Denver, is getting amped up for the New Kids on the Block show at the 1stBank Center in July.
Roof raise, bitches.
Maybe they are, but not this Saturday. The locally owned Denver joint is hosting Colorado breweries who are under 2 years old. Aw. Babies. This is an '80s-themed party (they are celebrating NKOTB!) and costumes are highly encouraged.
Info: Saturday p.m.-close; 303-997-9911; $19.86
Peach Grand Cru tapping
Holy hell, I'm drooling. If I wasn't working Sunday, I would be dry humping this beer. Great Divide, 2201 Arapahoe St., Denver, is tapping a small batch of Belgian-style strong ale brewed with -- ready? -- 200 pounds of fresh Colorado Palisade peaches.
Drool. It has 12.3 percent ABV. Salivating over here. Limited quantities are available in the Great Divide Tap Room.
Good drunk to you!
Info: Sunday at 2 p.m.; 303-296-9460