Associated Press

Evan Rachel Wood recently split with Marilyn Manson. Shocker.

Evan Rachel Wood gave People magazine her exclusive convoluted statement as to why she and Marilyn Manson broke up.

Unsure as to why we needed an explanation...

Whoever's the lucky one to date him next, then we'll take a statement. He must have a sweet collection of Stila makeup.

Either that or his lasagna is off the hook.

True lust

Kendra Wilkinson from "The Girls Next Door" just got engaged to Philadelphia Eagles football star Hank Baskett.

One day she's dining on mashed food and Metamucil and the next she's got one tight end. Oops, he's a wide receiver. Or is she the wide receiver? Touché.

Looks like no hard feelings on Hef's side:

"I have given her my blessing and will be giving her away at a very special wedding ceremony at the Playboy Mansion this coming June," Hugh Hefner said in a statement.

Look for the wedding registry at Fascinations.

Trick or treat

Kate Hudson hosted a costume party at her Pacific Palisades home and entertained 200 guests.

Literally.

It was BYOL -- bring your own lube.

On her own

Sienna Miller finished her homewrecking summer with "Brothers and Sisters" star Balthazar Getty and is happy to be single.

"I'm single at the moment, and I'm completely happy with that. It's nice not to have a relationship that the press constantly want to scrutinize and discuss. I'm cool with being on my own," she said.

As are 29 percent of Hollywood wives. Make that 28 percent.

I think she just nailed the cast and crew of "Entourage."

Hot head

Naomi Campbell angered a handful of airline travelers when she was allowed to cut in line at New York's JFK airport to get through customs upon arriving in the U.S. from London.

The supermodel's lawyer insists it is normal procedure for celebrities to be escorted through customs first, "so high-profile passengers aren't besieged by people."

Campbell then began to pelt the masses with their own cell phones and had a spitting spasm on the linoleum. She's such a delicate little flower.

Too old for high school

Gabrielle Union busted out a cheerleading uniform for her "Bring It On"-themed birthday party over the weekend.

Standing in her spankies, she realized what a loser she was because she was turning 36, not 18.

'Sex' tease

Sarah Jessica Parker bitch-slapped Kim Cattrall again by putting a damper on "Sex and the City" movie sequel rumors.

Cattrall told a British TV show her and her pals will shoot the second movie next summer.

"I'm thrilled to know Kim is excited but all the deals are not yet done," SJP tells Access Hollywood.

Then she said, "I make more than you, Kim -- na na na na na na!"

Parker always has a way to ruin the mole. I mean mood.

Seriously?

This quote was from April, but who's keeping track?

"I have liked big tits ever since I was a kid. I was breastfed for too long, I think. It messed me up," Kanye West said.

Oh, it just keeps getting better with this kid.

Your poor mother is rolling in her grave, so desperately wanting to choke you. Do it, Donda!