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| Headline to Appear HereFANTZ: Madonna dropped her drawersIt's that time of year where droves of prairie dogs thrust their cute little butts up in the air and cutoff jorts reign in all varieties (donned by all genus of human). That special time when we chase our noses down the turnpike after sneezing them off and when Madonna mirrors a two-bit hooker. Full Story FANTZ: Miley Cyrus tops Maxim's Hot 100 listMaxim magazine touts itself as "the ultimate guys guide" and the "source of hot girls." They just revealed their annual Hot 100 list for 2013, with Miley Cyrus as No. 1. (Jennifer Love Hewitt is No. 6 and Manti Te'o's Fake Girlfriend is No. 69. Telltale signs of our backup toilet paper, gloss-embossed.) Full Story FANTZ: This development is in no way arrestedIt's almost time. Holy *scream.* It's almost time. The comeback season for "Arrested Development" launches May 26 on Netflix, and I'm afraid I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run, so I have something of a mess on my hands. (There's so many poorly chosen words in that sentence.) Full Story FANTZ: Crying foul at Gwyneth PaltrowPeople magazine named Gwyneth Paltrow 2013's "Most Beautiful Woman" in its new issue. The internet outrage is quite amusing. I would've gone with Norm Macdonald, but I'm of no consequence. Full Story FANTZ: Jay-Z reaching for the NBA starsSince Jay-Z has nothing but leisure on his diamond-crusted hands, he's going to become an NBA agent. The rapper is getting rid of his 1 percent ownership share in the Brooklyn Nets in order to receive his certification as an agent. Full Story FANTZ: Hollywood's princesses and damsels in distressIt's almost National Princess Week (April 21-27). I've got my pink tulle, my Claire's tiara and my magic wand, AKA corn dog. In honor of this arbitrary week, Hollywood Headaches took the liberty in honoring some modern day princesses and three reasons why they deserve the status. Full Story FANTZ: Long John Mayer and Katy Perry splitJohn Mayer's banana hammock was seen weed whacking landmarks around Hollywood without Katy Perry's jugs in tow. (Sidebar: Many of the singer's famous exes have boasted the boy's large cup size. I cry foul. 34C tops.) The singers broke up for the second time. Full Story |  | |
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