'Twas the night before Thanksgiving and all through the house, not a creature was stirring, except your loud-as-shit grumbling stomach from those seven shots you thought were a good idea at the pre-Thanks pub crawl.
Typically, our generation's tradition has been to pub crawl it up before Thanksgiving, wake up hungover, help mom stuff the bird, take a nap, then dive tongue-first into some hardcore green bean casserole.
I'll speak for myself.
This holiday weekend is full of, uh, great football! Or shopping for the brave. Don't sit stagnant on your couch. Go drink off those calories. It's a holiday!
For car nerds, this weekend is your weekend at the Colorado Convention Center, 700 14th St., Denver, where the Rocky Mountain Auto Show runs today Friday through Sunday.
This Denver tradition is entering its 16th year and will be bringing more than 500 elite and customized cars, trucks and motorcycles for ye to drool over. The cars range from the nation's pimpest cars to custom creations and mint-condition originals.
If you see a 1960s-era Lincoln Continental with suicide doors and wings, put it in your purse. I'll pick it up from you later. Thanks.
Info: Friday and Saturday 9 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sunday 9 a.m.-6 p.m.; therockymountainautoshow.com; $12-$15
Dance off the pie
Oh, you kids and your nightclubs.
Ahem. I mean "we" kids.
If you haven't been to Beta, 1909 Blake St., Denver, then you probably should. Everybody's doing it. And sometimes bandwagons are fun, so hop on, because this is the prime destination for dancing. Or so I hear. (I only belly-up to dive bars. I'm old.)
Bro Safari will be spinning his bass-heavy mash-ups and moombahton (house music and reggaeton fusion).
Go get your mash on at what DJMAG.com called the No. 1 club in North America last year.
Info: Friday; betanightclub.com; $10
Not a shopper? Not a dancer? Not a football fan?
Let's video game it up, bitches.
The 1Up, 1925 Blake Street, Denver, is an adult arcade. No, there aren't topless dancers, but there are alcoholic beverages and a slew of vintage to modern arcade games (45 classic games, 15 pinball machines, three lanes of Skee-Ball, multiple sets of giant Jenga).
Also, they have forties. Forties! The bar also offers food and party platters. (You're a party platter.)
Looking for a less bro-tastic joint? Try its new location, The 2Up, 717 E. Colfax Ave., in the Capital Hill area of Denver, and join your hipster-ific homies over there for the same accoutrements and shit.
(Such a lady.)