Let's have a great talk here, Buffs. We know some of you will party. We really hope that you play it smart (we know you're a bunch of smartypantses) and safe out there. Don't overdo it, and don't drive or ride your bike! Walk with pals, cab it or use one of the late-night transportation options listed at http://housing.colorado.edu/resources-tips/transportation, and follow facebook.com/NightRideCU so you know when it's running and when it's not. And keep an eye on your pals, eh? It's what friends do.
As this publication's nightlife columnist, I'm ashamed to say my drink-mixing abilities consist of vodka-lemonade-daiquiri combo or cracking open a beer.
I know, I'm fancy.
So instead of relying on what I imagine are your similarly woeful bartending skills, here's a few local places ready and raring to get you a tasty drink. (Only if you are of-age, people! And in moderation!)
The Fat Albert
The Attic Bar and Bistro
949 Walnut St.
Take a detour off the main Pearl Street thoroughfare, climb some stairs and you've found yourself at the Attic Bar and Bistro, the home of Fat Albert.
You know, the purple drank?
Vodka, grape Kool-aid and lemonade combines for a fruity little number that'll get you to a more-than-tipsy state quick, so exercise caution. It's kind of their signature thing, you see. And on Tuesdays and Thursdays, those little-kid-delights-gone-PG13 are only $3.
Not too shabby.
Added bonus, on Saturdays, their deals are $1 Silver BB's (or 8oz Coors Light cans), which is adorable.
The Rio Grande Mexican Restaurant
1101 Walnut St.
The Rio Grande, it's got a reputation. Margaritas that'll make all the bad choices seem oh-so-good, which is why they limit those bad boys. But the one in particular makes me giggle like a child is the Manberry. (Quite possible I tee-heed while typing that.)
Fill a fancy glass half-way with the strawberry margarita, and then top it off with the mango.
Get it? Man-berry? HA.
It's a frozen blend worthy of your time. Oh, and while you're there, try the pineapple tequila. While I swore off the devil's drink in shot form a while ago, my ballsier friends insist, that it's the easiest tequila shot you can get. Another Rio specialty.
Car bombs and all things pumpkin
Conor O'Neill's Traditional Irish Pub
1922 13th St.
While the Irish Car Bomb may be ill-named -- just ask anyone Irish -- they're quite a crowd-pleasing drink.
Never heard of them? Epic fail on your part, but here, allow me to explain: Take a shot glass filled with half-Irish cream, half-Irish whiskey, and drop that in a half-filled pint of Guiness. Nothing like a curdled alcoholic mess to whisk away your inhibitions.
At Conor O'Neill's, they've got em for $3 every Thursday night.
But once we reach October, they bring out the good stuff. Pumpkin vodka. That's right. They infuse vodka with local pumpkins, some cinnamon, cloves, etc. And you know what they do with that concoction? They make things like pumpkin pie martinis and Black Pumpkins, which adds this special vodka to the aforementioned Irish Car Bomb. Spooky, eh?