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Where: 1575 Boulder St., Denver, 303-477-4600

Hours: 4-10 p.m. Sunday-Thursday. 4-11 p.m. Friday and Saturday.

Atmosphere: Glitzy-glam with low lights, big booths, rounded banquettes, a beautiful view of downtown and big busy bar.

A few things I am afraid of:

Heights. Psycho astronauts in diapers. Tiramisu martinis.

So I was seized with fear when I first saw the 40-item martini list at the Lower Highland restaurant Vita. Caramel apple martinis! Snickers martinis! Tiramisu martinis! Oh, my!

Call me old-fashioned, but yikes.

A martini is, or should be, a martini. It is gin (or maybe, maybe, vodka) stirred (or shaken, if vodka) with a little vermouth, then strained into a glass (with or without rocks) and sparely garnished with an olive or a twist.

(Or an onion, but that would officially make it a Gibson.)

A martini is not apple and butterscotch schnapps

shaken with vodka and garnished with graham cracker. It is not Baileys, Frangelico, Amaretto and Stoli Vanil drizzled with chocolate.

And it is most certainly not Starbucks Chocolate Liqueur and Kahlua, shaken with vodka and served in a chocolate-rimmed “martini” glass.

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