No, it s not Run Like a Pirate Day.
PAUL AIKEN
No, it s not Run Like a Pirate Day.



Ahoy, mateys!

Guess what holiday is Friday? Fine, technically it’s not a holiday, but hush, it’s a holiday to me and that’s all you need to be concerned with.

It’s International Talk Like a Pirate Day! Aaaaargh!

Denver is hosting its first-ever pirate convention on Saturday at the Denver Airport Marriott at Gateway Park, 16455 E. 40th Circle, Aurora.

Yeah, it may be a bit of a hike, but your weed dealer is, too, so suck it up.

Contrary to what your marmot said, you are not a pirate. (You were drunk.) But at this weekend’s BrethrenConwhich celebrates everything pirate — you can be.

The convention will have vendors, workshops, food and a zombie-pirate themed dance to close the evening. There will also be costume contests, a talk like a pirate contest, a Liar’s Dice tournament and more.

Just remember that a slutty shirt paired with an eyepatch doesn’t constitute authenticity. But “C+” for effort.

Info: Saturday from noon to midnight. brethrencon.com. 303-371-4333 begin_of_the_skype_highlighting 303-371-4333 end_of_the_skype_highlighting. $25-$30.

Smoke it up

Well, don’t do it in the theater, but perhaps a little hotbox action in the car beforehand…

In 1938, American exploitation film “Tell Your Children” was screened as a scare tactic about the dangers of marijuana use.

Ha!

Um. Anyway, the anti-pot film morphed into a new version called “Reefer Madness,” a stoner cult comedy that morphed into an off-Broadway musical satire which Showtime then turned into a film in 2005.

Bug Theatre, 3654 Navajo St., Denver, is presenting a local version of the musical featuring a cast of 20 and a five-piece live jazz band. Oooooh, jazzy.

Plus, the resin in your bong e-mailed me last night and told me it’s pretty damn funny, so go get high on comedy. And stuff.

Info: Friday and Saturday at 7:30 p.m. equinoxtheatredenver.com. 303-477-9984; $12-$15.

Oktoberfest

Go Denver! A Playboy.com columnist told USA Today that one of his top 10 great North American Oktoberfests is in Denver.

What a neat feat.

Sure, it would be damn super if we could all pile in a raft and head over to Munich, Germany, for the real thing, but Denver’s just a tad closer. Plus, it’s much cheaper and more convenient for dad to bail you out of jail on Sunday.

This weekend kicks off the festival, so bust out that lederhosen, dirndl and beer steins, do the chicken dance to some polka, pound some beer, eat a giant pretzel and stuff yourself with sauerkraut.

Bier! Wunderbar! Prost!

Info: Located on Larimer Street between 20th and 22nd streets. Friday, 5 p.m. to 1 a.m.; Saturday, 11 a.m. to 1 a.m.; Sunday, noon to 6 p.m.; Sept. 24, 5 p.m. to 1 a.m.; Sept 25, 11 a.m. to 1 a.m.; Sept 26, noon to 6 p.m.; oktoberfestdenver.com; Free.

Christy Fantz’s “Doing Denver” runs every Thursday in the Colorado Daily.