Ask Christy



Christy Fantz has relationship advice and she’s not afraid to dish it out. Send your questions to fantz@coloradodaily.com.

Dear Christy,

What are the rules for Facebook friendships with your exes?

I just got a friend request from an ex. I’m in a serious relationship and don’t want to start anything with the ex, but I am curious what he’s been up to, and anyway it seems drama to deny the request, like I’m still butt-hurt over the whole thing. Which I am not.

And to answer the obvious question, yes, I did on several occasions see his manjunk.

Is it wrong to accept his request, or does my now-man have the right to be jealous, or what the heck is the rule here?

A Gal with Some Notches

Notches:

First, accolades for using “manjunk.” The Fantz in my pants just got hot and bothered with that slang. Props.

My first instinct is to tell you to quit being such a damn Sally and let the man have access to your bragging buffet. (Facebook wall, laymen.)

Oh, please people, like the purpose of Facebook isn’t to boast. (Minus those drips who solely bitch. Ugh, you assholes grate my eyes’ nerves.)

I am all too familiar with this ex debacle.

It’s much easier to just fold him up and mail him to Disregard’s address in the memory because he was such a jerk. (Quite the contrary. You were the one who shoved his heart into a wine bottle and smashed it on his skull. Right? Right.)

As much as we think we want exes out of our lives, I was a little irked when one of mine dropped my ass on Facebook.

Attention! I wasn’t upset that I couldn’t stalk him because, well, I’ve had better. I was solely pissed that he couldn’t see how splendid my bragging has become.

Hush, I’m not vain. I’m just a fan of life. So, enough about you.

Oh, right. Get over it and friend him.

Your life is great, your new man is hot and your rack looks spectacular in that shirt.

But do not, I repeat, do not rekindle. Your new man’s junk is far superior.

As for seeing the exes’ goods, give me a break — like your eyes haven’t grazed at least seven of your current male Facebook friends’ junk before.

That’s what I thought. Tramp.

And if your current man gets peeved, then cheat on him. Oh dear. That was a joke.

Dear Christy,

I got drunk at a party and kissed a male friend… and I don’t regret it!

But, as a guy, I still love, love, LOVE chicks. I’m not really interested in anything below the belt with other dudes.

But kissing one wasn’t bad… does this make me gay, or just bicurious, or what?

Defying Labels

Labels:

Kissing is fantastic. And an extremely close second to well whiskey!

I could kiss all damn day.

No sir, not with you. The ladies’ room told me you get around. These luscious lips are for smooching, not scabbing.

Anyway, you seem like you aren’t interested in manjunk (thanks, Notches), and I would assume that would be a large gaydicator (Gay+indicator? No?).

However, have you ever manhandled a man’s manhood (besides your own)?

No? Then are you positive you aren’t interested? I believe I caught a “really” in between the “I’m not interested” up there. Not convincing, Mr. Labels.

Kissing the opposite sex doesn’t make you anything. We’ve all drunkenly done it. Um, I mean you’ve all done it.

If you are truly trying to find out if you are bi, gay or straight, you may have to hit below the belt.

And while you’re down there…

Good talk.