When “Man vs. Food” host Adam Richman stormed into Boulder last May, food won. The man who earned his living wolfing down unhealthy amounts of food couldn’t finish the West End Tavern’s Wing King challenge.
I mean, who could blame the guy? He had just 30 minutes to eat 50 sauce-smothered wings. Then again, some 50 or so determined eaters are official Wing Kings. Boulder is full of gluttonous challenges, and Richman only tipped the top off some of the area’s finest eating challenges.
From wings that are sizzling hot to sandwiches that weigh more than newborn babies, if you’re up for a stomach-ruining challenge, Boulder has plenty to choose from.
Handling the Mother Lode,
Silver Mine Subs, 1100 28th St., Boulder, 303-402-9400
You may have heard of Silver Mine Subs’ Mother Lode sandwich. It’s a 16-inch hoagie weighed down by roast beef, ham, salami, turkey breast, cheese and vegetables. Here’s what you’re going to have to do: Eat that bad-boy in 10 minutes or less, and it’s free. But there’s a consolation prize, too: If you can stomach it in less than twenty minutes, it’ll set you back just under $16, and you’ll win a T-shirt that will embarrass the hell out of your significant other.
How Macho Are You?
Del Taco, 1100 13th St., Boulder, 303-440-3695
Burritos are a thing of beauty, and yes, I realize how tubby that makes me sound. But over at Del Taco on the University Hill, the Macho Burrito is waiting. From 7 to 8 p.m. Friday nights, you have two minutes to inhale the 19-ounce tortilla log. If you can handle it you win an official I Am Macho T-shirt and a coupon for a free meal. This challenge is a cheap one; it only costs about $5.
The Fear of the Ghost Wing
Oskar Blues Home Made Liquids & Solids, 1555 South Hover Road, Longmont, 303-485-9400
The ghost wing sauce at Oskar Blues in Longmont is scary hot. But if you can handle a 2-pound bucket of wings smothered in the stuff in ten minutes, dealing with the damage it’ll do to your taste buds can wait. You’ll also need to save a bit of room because you have to finish the celery and carrots that come with the wings. If you can handle it, the $16 wings are free and you’ll win a T-shirt. This challenge also comes with a beer.
Eat like George Hypolite
Village Coffee Shop, 1605 Folsom St., Boulder, 303-442-9689
This is one of Boulder’s unofficial gut-busting challenges, and although you won’t win a T-shirt or a free meal, this one’s all about the pride. Hypolite, the former-CU defensive tackle, used to devour a pile of pancakes, a ham and cheese omelet, toast and hash browns in just 20 minutes at Boulder’s Village Coffee Shop. His appetite even spawned an unofficial Eat Like George Hypolite Day. Now, you may want to head over to the Coffee Shop just to prove to yourself that you can eat like George Hypolite.
Bull Testicles, Anyone?
Nederland, 2012. Start training.
You may have missed the annual Rocky Mountain oyster eating contest last weekend at Frozen Dead Guy Days, but that just means you have another year to practice your gluttonous ways. If you’ve never watched an episode of Fear Factor, these “oysters” come from the nether regions of a bull. Nederland’s First Street Pub and Grill hosts the annual event. So, keep overfeeding yourself, this year the contest’s prize was $100.