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J essica Simpson had a baby last week and named the girl Maxwell.

They plan to call her Maxi.

Neat. A long skirt, dress or coat, if you will.

I prefer the femme diaper.

What a pretty dude

Brad Pitt will be the new spokesmodel for Chanel No. 5’s ad campaign.

Hold please.

Paging Ms. No. 5, there’s a call for you on line Fantz.

“Bonjour. Oui. Oui?”


“Greetings, Ms. No. 5. Did you know Brad’s a dude?”

Sure, he sometimes swings Clooney, but I’m pretty sure at times he feigns nailing Angie.

Oui? Weeeeee!

Bells will ring

A new track by Kanye West features the ghett-prose: “I saw you in the club in a white dress/Now I want to put you in a white dress.”

Well I saw you in da club, bottle full of bub.

False. I don’t go to clubs of your caliber, dandy boy.

Groan. Kanye’s lyrics are serenading Kim Kardashian.

Ah, the pair is paving the demise of the “celebrity.”