
Drake is serious about lint control.
During Game 2 of the Raptors and Nets showdown in the NBA playoffs, he was filmed aggressively lint-rolling his pants courtside. So, the Raptors decided to hand out 1,200 Drake/OVO-branded lint rollers during Game 5.
For some reason, this just feels SO Drake. It suits his personality. I want to see Drake the Proud NBA Girlfriend de-linting LeBron.
I also really want a whole bunch of weirdly mundane merch, and I’m going to spend some time imagining ways our stars could go beyond T-shirts and posters and into our everyday tasks. Join me, won’t you?
Lady Gaga insoles
Don’t have men to carry you around in a giant egg? It’s OK. Now you, too, can wear impossibly tall designer heels and still walk around. (Available at the next Alexander McQueen show.)
Jay-Z car wax
Whether it’s a Range Rover or a Lexus, keep it looking brand new. (At a dealer near you.)
Beyonce-brand Midol
Don’t let cramps or headaches stop you from being ***Flawless and running the world, girls.
Iggy Pop sunblock
For the man who can’t keep his shirt on. (Also available in SPF RHCP (Red Hot Chili Peppers.)
Taylor Swift auto-reply app
So many unwanted texts. “We are never getting back together. Like. Ever.”
Madonna blender
For all of your organic, homemade veggie drinks and protein shakes.
Lindsay Lohan calendar
(She tried to sing. I’m counting it.)
It’s really, really hard to keep track of your appointments and flight times, or even what day it is.
Kanye West
There’s nothing Kim hasn’t already done, is there? And what’s hers is his.
Mariah Carey nail file
It’s glittery, and your nails will be, too.
Rihanna umbrella
Nope. Too easy. Never mind. I’m sorry.
Contact Ashley Dean at 303-473-1109. On Twitter: twitter.com/AshaleyJill.