Each year, around this time, my friend says to me, “Dude, I just don’t know that our sweaters are ugly enough for all these parties this month …” And after our shameful failure two years ago, she’s probably right.
She found a few sweatshirts with goofy snowmen and Christmas crap all over ’em. We had hoped they would suffice for a party of we were hosting. Another friend went hot-glue gun crazy, slapping cotton balls and odd felt shapes to an itchy red sweater, and was voted the ugliest all f***in’ night.
Clearly, the judges — aka: waiters and bartenders we slurred-speech asked to choose a winner — were biased to the D.I.Y. set. Damn crafts.
Looking at this weekend (and our celebration of the second anniversary of her 25th birthday), we best roll around in broken ornaments and glitter or something, because Boulder wants uggo winter wear in its taprooms.
Like at Finkel and Garf Brewing (5455 Spine Rd.), which is hosting an Ugly Sweater Party Saturday from 4-8 p.m. So dress up and bring along an under-$15 gift for the white elephant exchange. Make it fun, folks, because the way I understand it, your gift gets you entered into the exchange, and you can laugh as others get stuck with the oddball purchase you made. It’s gonna be grand, and definitely where this beer gal’s headed.
Folks at Vindication Brewing Co. (6880 Winchester Cir.) are also in the mood for crap-tastic holiday sweaters. Friday, they’ll hand out two growlers of choice to the best of the worst contestants at 8 p.m. Bumper Crop food truck will be there to cushion copious beer consumption.
(Amendment to last week’s anti-holiday column: If I’m being force-fed carols, I may as well embrace the fashion-backwards trend that is the ugly sweater. A happy byproduct of this month-long ode to Christmas.)
Wild Woods Brewery (5460 Conestoga Ct.) spent Thursday releasing all kinds of beers that’ll make your tongue super happy. And for one of them, Wild Woods teamed up with BRU Handbuilt Ales across the road to concoct the Winter Warmer. This is an 8-percent ABV brew that has mace, clove, bitter orange peel and honey, all fermented with Wisconsin cranberries. Suppose I could have also just said, “is delicious.”
Let us not forget, though, the big release Avery Brewing (5763 Arapahoe Ave.) is holding Sunday. It’s a party to celebrate No. 24 and No. 25 in its barrel-aged series. Spontanea and Einzigartig are some grape-beer hybrids, packed with flavors that’ll shock even a beer snob’s mouth.
From the release, it sounds like making these fine brews was quite the process, and one I guarantee folks there would love to chat about. They’re kind of beer nerds, you see, and love talking about beer as much as they love drinking it. Bottle sales start at 11 a.m. Sunday, with a 12-bottle limit of each beer, per person. They’ll also be tapping into a bunch of shmancy, exclusive beers like caffeinA and Bourbkin.
As per usual, the Bohemian Biergarten will have laughs for you Sunday. Denver comedian Ben Kronberg is hitting the stage for the Boulder Comedy Show at 7 p.m. Kronberg’s had a special on Comedy Central and has also been featured on “Last Comic Standing.” The free show will feature a few other comedians sure to get you chuckling.