Cyrus McCrimmon / The Denver Post
Justin Sullivan / Associated Press
Say what you want about coupon clippers, but when you’re paying out the ass for rent or staring aggressive student loans in the face, you’ll wish you’d lived on deals and happy hours.
I can’t even flirt my way to a cocktail. Guess my quirky, foul-mouthed charm doesn’t work on everyone.
Best to get on the sensible spending train now, so you don’t find yourself skimping on latex or lingerie. You know, the important stuff.
Trust me, well vodka tastes just fine by midnight.
Get plugged in
Want cheap booze? Of course there’s an app for that. Or a site, or something that’ll guide you to your nearest happy hour.
Take drinkinthebuff.com. A couple of website smarties set up a site that tells you who’s hosting a happy hour at the time you log on. They also have deals sorted by location, via a nifty map, or by just name of the place. It’s actually wonderfully helpful, detailing what times the happy hour runs from, what type of cuisine it has, etc.
There’s also boulderhappyhours.com. It’s a bit more simple — just a list of all the eateries, bars, breweries, etc. in town with their happy hours listed. You’ll find what’s on special on each day, too, helping you gauge what kind of night it’s going to be. There’s also an app for that, for both Apple and Android technologies.
Follow your favorite spot
You’d be amazed how many of your favorite bars and breweries are online, tempting you with sweet deals or new beer releases while you’re sneaking Facebook during class.
I’ve found, in my reporting travels, most will preview a new beer release or a band’s performance with a quick post on Facebook and/or Twitter, making sure you know in plenty of time to lie your way out of an awkward dinner with that high school friend who’s in town for the night.
You’ll also find a lot of places have deals specifically listed on their websites. I know that’s a pain in the ass, though, but hey. What else do you have to do, besides homework?
Let’s unite our calendars
Breweries are creatures of habit. Most will release new beers or hold happy hours at the same times each week. Like Wild Woods Brewing (5460 Conestoga Ct.), the brewers there tend to release new brews on Thursdays. They also offer double-stamps on your rewards card if you fill up a growler on Wednesdays. Fate Brewing (1600 38th St.) tends to release new beers on Sundays and Mondays. Or if you fill up your growler on Monday, you’ll snag a free pint.
I could go on and on, but every brewery has its own weekly routine. Just sync it up to yours, and you’ll be well on your way to becoming a regular.
Bars, well, they’re even easier. Just plug into what their weekly specials are — typically a set of hours each day and night — and you’ll be set.
Just keep reading
I’m such a sweetheart, I’m going to list out just a few happy hour deals right here to get you started.
Walrus Saloon, 1911 11th St.
Happy Hours: Monday-Saturday, 4-8 p.m.
$1 well drinks on Sunday; $2 flavored vodka drinks on Tuesday; free drinks for the ladies on Wednesday; $3 calls all night on Thursday; deals on fish bowls Friday and Saturday.
The Sink, 1165 13th St.
Happy Hours: Monday-Friday, 3-6 p.m.; Tuesday-Saturday, 10 p.m.- a.m.; all day Sunday.
Press Play Bar, 1005 Pearl St.
Happy Hours: Every day from 4-7 p.m.
$3 well drinks and wine, $3 domestic beers, $3.50 import beers
The Rio Grande, 1101 Walnut St.
Happy Hours: Monday-Friday, 3-6 p.m.; $1 off classic Rio margaritas, Big Tex margaritas and Rickys; $3 drafts, Tecate cans and shots of Cuervo Cinge; Thursday’s late-night happy hour from 9 p.m.-midnight features $4 classic Rio margaritas.
The Attic Bar and Bistro, 949 Walnut St.
Happy Hours: Monday-Saturday, 3-6 p.m.; Sunday 9 p.m.-close
$3 wells, drafts and Fat Alberts; $2 Mini Alberts; $3.75 wines